Have you ever been into a situation where despite being prepared, fully equipped with knowledge or experience, you still end up below expected results? It happened to me countless times and I wonder if there are more beyond the Right Time that contributes to the success or failure of oneself, both for personal or career endeavors.
I was once a smoker. A smoker for more than 15 years which started during my senior years in college and went on and on until one day, I finally told myself that this is it, this ends now. My journey towards quitting the bad habit has been planned from the 1st year I was exposed to nicotine, but as I began to quit, the urge of lighting one persist even more than ever. I was then beginning to admit that I might die a smoker sooner or later. I have had many attempts to stop as I have always reminded myself that today is the right time to quit, this month, this day, even this date is the right time. But does the right time lead to a successful attempt? In my case, it is not.
I contemplated more on the idea that if this is the right time, then why did I failed again?
I stop smoking last September 1, 2016. It was not planned like all the attempts I made before. It was abrupt. The night of August 31, 2016, was the night I finally convinced myself that this must end tonight. The fear of dying young, the fear of dying painfully associated with tobacco, the fear of not seeing my daughter grow old, and the fear of not being able to make my life worth living, all mixed up in an instant, which pushed me to make a personal decision. I still have a few more cigarettes that night and tried to light them up before midnight. Come midnight, I was left with one last stick, so the temptation to light it up was there, but since I felt so happy that the right time is RIGHT, I just put it back in the cigarette holder and made it a living reminder that this right time’s right, for my smoking to end. I still kept that cigarette up to now and I am happy to say that, yes, I am tobacco-free for 4 straight years..and counting.
When I woke up on the morning of September 1, 2016, I confess that the urge, the temptation, and the eagerness to smoke exist but that doesn’t prevent me to say no. Co-workers invite me to a smoking session after lunch but I politely told them I quit. They did not believe me but I believe in myself that I finally can stand up without a cigarette. I was blessed that the urge stopped and the thought of smoking simply disappeared in my mind. I trained myself to cover my nose whenever I chance upon a smoker in public places and convinced myself that tobacco, in general, emits a bad smell. Since then I see tobacco and the smoke in a different way.
From that day forward, I learned to accept that if the right time is not right, I might not get the expected results. What I understand more from that experience is that sometimes, it is just not enough to have the right timing for everything. But to have the right time RIGHT paves a way to a meaningful journey that we may feel contented, happy, and fulfilled.
